


"Welcome! Everything is fine."

by burbear



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Good Place (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - The Good Place (TV) Fusion, Angst, Awkward Flirting, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 11:56:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,747
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17324552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/burbear/pseuds/burbear
Summary: The afterlife was a lot weirder than Tony thought it should be. For one, it's called the Good Place, and the points system that decides whether a person goes to the Good Place or not definitely had a flaw in it somewhere because, hello, why would he, Tony Stark of all people, be in the Good Place? Also, there's a ridiculous number of frozen yogurt shops.Just what the fork is going on here?





	"Welcome! Everything is fine."

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sara_wolfe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sara_wolfe/gifts).



> happy holidays, sara_wolfe! the good place is a current favorite show of mine, so i jumped at the chance to write this. i hope you enjoy!
> 
> big thanks to [writerly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writerly/pseuds/Writerly), the best pegasus ever. you're incredible and i am the luckiest forking bat alive to have you as a friend.
> 
> Prompt: _"Congratulations, Tony. You're in the Good Place." Death is only the beginning for Tony, who's got his entire afterlife to explore his new life beside his soulmate, Bucky. But there's something not quite right about their little piece of Heaven…_

Tony shifted and stretched, groaning a little. Loathe as he was to admit it, he might be getting a little old for the two-day engineering binges in the workshop.

“JARVIS, make a note and knock me out with a tranquilizer or something fun after working for a straight… thirty-six hours? No, let’s not get too crazy. Start small, make it forty.”

The complete lack of response, even of JARVIS’s long-suffering sigh, sent Tony into high alert. He opened his eyes to an unfamiliar room. The colors ranged from muted beige walls to muted grey carpeting and furniture, making the plants on either side of the room as well as the giant green text on the wall pop out.

_Welcome! Everything is fine._

The door to his left opened, revealing a rather smartly dressed older man. “Tony! Come on in.”

Okay, this was shaping up to be one of, if not the weirdest kidnappings he’d ever been in. Whoever was running this operation must be really confident or stupid or a disastrous combination of both. They didn’t even tie his hands behind his back. There were also no other exits from this room, so Tony had no other choice but to follow him into the office and sit down at the desk. Might as well try to get as much information as he can.

“Hello, Tony, I’m Michael. How are you today?”

“Fine,” he replied. “Definitely been worse. Quick question, where am I, who do you work for, and how much money do they want? Not that they’ll get anything, of course. More of a bet going on with my buddy Rhodey, you see, if the amount goes over a certain threshold—”

“You’re dead, Tony.”

“Right, right, dead if they don’t get paid, not my first rodeo here, buddy.”

“No, Tony, I mean. You died. You, Tony Stark, died. Your time on Earth has ended, welcome to the afterlife.”

His stomach swooped uncomfortably, chills shaking his bones and raising gooseflesh on his skin. “Oh?” Tony said, tone mild. “Don’t remember dying. I usually do, it’s happened a couple of times.”

Michael chuckled. “Yes, of course. We typically erase the memory of dying in cases of rather traumatic or embarrassing deaths. Makes transitioning easier on the soul.”

“Uh huh. You don’t happen to know how I died by chance, do you?”

Holding up a finger, Michael consulted the clipboard in front of him. “Ah yes, right here. You sure you want to hear this?”

Tony shrugged. He’d done plenty of embarrassing and traumatic things, how bad could it be. “Hit me with it.”

“Well,” Michael began. He adjusted his glasses and cleared his throat. “There was an incident in your workshop when you were working on the latest iteration of the Iron Man armor. Your robot, DUM-E? That’s cute, I like that, DUM-E, like dummy, that’s funny. Anyway, he determined there was a fire hazard and sprayed you with a fire extinguisher. Unfortunately you inhaled enough of the extinguishing powder that, between it and your already reduced lung capacity, it resulted in you suffocating.”

“Well,” Tony said. “That’s. Something. Am I in Hell?”

“What? Oh, no, the afterlife is nothing like the Heaven or Hell that was popularized amongst you humans. Generally speaking, however, there is a Good Place and a Bad Place.”

Oh, here it comes, the other shoe dropping. With only two options like that, Tony had a pretty good idea of where he was. At least there seemed to be a system in place for letting people down easy. It explained the inoffensive decor, the mild-mannered but friendly man—angel? Didn’t matter. Tony held his breath and braced himself for the final verdict.

“Congratulations, Tony. You’re in the Good Place.”

  


* * *

  


So, a few things.

One: Whether or not someone went to the Good Place or the Bad Place depended on a complex point system. Every action had a positive or negative value and the sum total upon death determined where you were headed. Extremely high positive scores went to the Good Place. Tony personally didn’t think he belonged in any kind of Good Place, but maybe the universe had seen his change of heart and weighed it as something overwhelmingly positive. Rich man and the eye of the needle and all that.

Two: Soulmates were real and Tony had one assigned to him, which was weird but kind of comforting.

Three: The Good Place actually consisted of many clusters called Neighborhoods that varied in some way or another, and they were created by Architects like Michael. The Good Place also boasted an absurd amount of frozen yogurt shops, a commonality across all the Neighborhoods. After the introduction he’d gotten to the afterlife, he’d thought he’d been hit with all the weird there could possibly be.

Whatever. Not much he could do about it anyway. Especially while Michael lead him to his new house, which looked like a cross between his Malibu home and the Stark mansion.

“So, out of curiosity, what famous people are in the Bad Place?”

“Hm, let me think. Most presidents. Mozart, Picasso, Elvis—lots of artists in the Bad Place.”

“How about Marie Curie? Nikola Tesla?”

“Them too,” Michael confirmed.

“That makes no sense,” Tony argued. “They were better people than me, easily.”

“Oh, Tony,” he said. “You don’t know that for a fact. I say that because you can’t ever access their point records, but the thing is that you don’t know everything about them. Neither do I, for that matter, it’s not my place to judge souls. You’re here for a reason, Tony. You turned Stark Industries around, set plans in motion to make clean, renewable energy for everyone a reality. And you're Iron Man! That’s pretty big. Like your house! Go on, try the door.”

It swung open easily at his touch. The interior featured a monochromatic color scheme with sleek lines, though the furniture reminded him of the pieces in his home growing up. “Wow.”

“I know, right? Each person’s home is a reflection of their heart. It’s a nice touch, don’t you think?” Suddenly, there was a knocking sound behind them. “Oh, good. Tony, meet your soulmate!”

Oh god, right. He had a soulmate now. Turning toward the door, Tony pasted on his best camera-ready smile.

“Now, James—sorry, you said you go by Bucky, Bucky, this is Tony. Tony, Bucky!”

Tall, broad, and heart-stoppingly gorgeous walked into his home, and Tony was stunned speechless because that was a very distinctive blue coat to go with a very distinctive face. This had to be a setup, it had to be. It wasn’t possible.

“Bucky?” he said weakly. “As in Bucky _Barnes_?”

“Oh, good, you know of him!” Michael clapped his hands. “How wonderful. I’ll leave you two to get acquainted. Other soulmates to pair up, you know!” He breezed out the door, shutting it behind him. Leaving Tony alone. With Bucky Barnes.

His soulmate.

“So uh, guess my reputation precedes me,” Bucky murmured. He held out his right hand. “Don’t suppose I can have the pleasure of knowing your name?”

“Tony,” he blurted, finally shaking himself out of his daze and grabbing Bucky’s hand, wondering how someone could be wearing a wool coat and gloves in such heat. “Tony Stark.”

Bucky’s eyebrows went up a little at the mention of his surname. “Knew a couple of Starks when I was alive,” he said casually. “You got a Dolly or a Howard in your family tree by chance?”

Wincing, Tony nodded, pulling his hand away so he could shove both into his pockets. “Howard Stark was my father. So uh, personal question, it’s really bugging me. Were you waiting for a soulmate the last seventy years or did you just wake up here today like everyone else.”

Shifting his weight from one leg to the other, Bucky rubbed at his shoulder. “The latter,” he murmured after a moment.

“Really?” Huh. Then again, time must not really matter once you’re dead, he mused. The sorting process for soulmates was probably as intricate as the point system for that very reason. “Another question for you, what do you think of the point system they’ve got going on here?”

Bucky shrugged. “Seems like it’s not my place to question it. If I’m honest, though? Bit unfair.”

“Right? I mean, we’re working with incomplete data but still.”

“Incomplete data, huh? So you’re big into science like H—”

“I’m big into science, yes,” Tony interrupted. Having his soulmate compare him to his father was not something he wanted or needed right now. “It’s a pretty forking big part of who I am—wait, why did I say fork when I wanted to say fork? Fork. What the fork is happening?”

There’s amusement in Bucky’s eyes as he gave his answer. “No swearing allowed in the Good Place. Shoulda seen me when I tried to say bullshirt the first time.”

Tony cocked his head, his eyes narrowing. “Are you making fun of me, because there’s no forking way that’s what happens when you say bullshirt. Shirt? What ash-hole made these censors up?”

Bucky didn’t manage to muffle his laugh in time. “You’re somethin’ else, you know that?”

“So I’ve been told, but I bet you’ll give me a run for my money.”

“Nah, nothing more than a soldier.”

“Oh, I doubt that very much, Buckybear.”

Bucky ducked his head down, bashful, in a way. He coughed and ran a hand through his hair. “Hey, so did you hear about one of the neighbors throwing some kinda fancy to-do a couple houses over? Supposed to be a get-to-know-you type of party. Wanna go check it out, see what kinda swells we got runnin’ around here?”

Part of him wanted to say yes, mostly because of Bucky’s charm. His manner of speech was endearing in a way he hadn’t expected. But after everything that had been dumped on him today, Tony found himself bone-deep tired and exhausted. “Honestly? I need to sit back and process this. Back ho—back… when I was alive, I had JARVIS to help me with that. Probably take longer now since he’s not here to stop me running in circles.”

“Sure,” Bucky said easily, and god, Tony could kiss him for that. “Be a good idea if I do the same. We can catch up tomorrow? I’d like to try that weird frozen yogurt stuff, wonder if it’s anything like frozen custard.”

“Yeah, we can do anything we want,” Tony replied, a small smile on his face. “Got the whole rest of eternity ahead of us.”

“Til tomorrow, then.” Bucky left with a jaunty wave and closed the door behind him, leaving Tony all alone inside his large, quiet house.

Right, time to be alone with his thoughts. Maybe, if he’s lucky, he’ll tire himself out and sleep for an hour or two.

  


* * *

  


The next morning did not turn out as smoothly as the day before. No, instead Tony woke up to freezing cold temperatures and the sound of angry thunder. He rushed outside, knee deep in snow, and couldn’t believe what he saw.

Fire extinguishers. Fire extinguishers steadily spraying more and more snow on the ground. This was supposed to be the Good Place, a perfect afterlife, what could possibly be the purpose of something like this happening? Tony looked around, hoping to find Michael so he could ask what what exactly was going on. His eyes landed on Bucky instead, sensing something very wrong, so he rushed to Bucky’s side. Bucky’s face looked vacant, thousand yard stare in full force, though he went easily when Tony tugged him back to his house and sat him down on his couch, piling blanket after blanket on him.

Eventually, life returned to Bucky’s eyes, and he gathered the blankets around him. “Thanks,” he mumbled.

“Don’t mention it,” Tony said, waving it off. Especially since this must be my fault, he thought darkly. Anomaly in the program, a bug in the otherwise perfect system.

Bucky huffed. “If not for you I’d still be out there freezing my tail off. Not exactly nothing.”

Forking beautiful stupid idiot. Now he couldn’t not tell Bucky.

“Yeah, well. I think…” Tony hesitated, tapping his fingers in a quick tattoo on his leg. “I think what's happening out there is because I was sent here by mistake. There’s no way I belong in the Good Place.”

“What?”

Tony nodded and paced back and forth. Being in the Good Place, being assigned a soulmate—Bucky Barnes, of all people!—made absolutely zero sense. Sure, he was doing some serious good at the end of his life with being Iron Man and redirecting Stark Industries to renewable, clean energy, but it was only in the beginning stages and hadn’t accomplished all that much yet, so if this point system worked at all, that couldn’t possibly make up for all the lives lost by the weapons he’d invented.

Did giving to charities count if he’d trusted Pepper to vet them? Tony had never questioned supporting this foundation and that cause because Pepper had a better moral compass than he ever did. Then again, he’d trusted Obie with his company and look what happened there. What was the point count for trusting a good person versus a bad person?

Ugh. He was going to think himself into a migraine at this rate. Binary systems only worked well for computers. Why couldn’t there be a middle ground? It could be called the Okay Place, where dead people who weren’t necessarily extremely good or extremely bad could go exist in mediocrity.

Granted, he’d definitely go bonkers in the Okay Place just as easily as he did here, because really, Tony Stark? Mediocre? Absolutely not.

Maybe there could be more tiers, like Dante’s layers of hell, only with the Good Place at the top, the Bad Place at the bottom, the Okay Place in the middle, and more of a spectrum between them. Not as Bad as You Could Be Place and More Than Okay Place.

Sheesh, barely been here a day and already revolutionized the afterlife.

“What? Tony, come on, that’s crazy.”

“Is it? Because the fire extinguishers in the sky say otherwise.”

Bucky frowned. “Well, if you don’t belong here then there’s definitely no chance that I do.”

“Hey, no,” Tony said. “Just because I was assigned your soulmate doesn’t mean I’m dragging you down with me.”

“And I’m sayin’ you don’t gotta,” Bucky countered. “I ain’t done anything noteworthy that would put me in the Good Place. Done plenty that would land me in the Bad Place.”

“Please, someone like you should never be put in the Bad Place,” Tony said, rolling his eyes. “I’ll bet that my reasons for not belonging here are way better than yours. In fact, I have at the very least several million.”

“Dang it, Stark—”

“Look, believe what you want. I know what happened in my life and I deserve to be held accountable for it.”

“Do you ever let anyone get a word in edgewise?”

“Nope, so get used to it.”

Bucky sighed. He fiddled with his gloves, plucking at the fingertips of his left hand. He pulled at it a little, then tugged it back. “Look, I’m not trying to make light of your past,” he said quietly. “I don’t know much about it, or you, for that matter. But you don’t know me, either. The things I did were unforgivable, at least to me.”

Tony’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest. Jesus, he was an ash-hole of the highest degree. “Bucky, hey—”

“Let me finish.” Bucky waited a beat, then continued. “The way I see it, we were paired for a reason. Maybe what happened with the fire extinguishers earlier was because of you, maybe the blizzard was because of me. Maybe that other wacky stuff was from some other person who thinks they don’t belong here. I think we have a better chance of figuring it out, though, if we work together.”

A spark of hope took root inside Tony, the first real feeling of hope he’d had since he’d gotten to the afterlife. “Why not?” he said at last. “Not like we’ve got anything to lose. Together, then.”

Bucky smiled and threaded his right hand into Tony’s left, squeezing gently. Such a small thing warmed him through and through, lit him up from the inside. Between the two of them, they could definitely figure this out.

Yeah, together sounded pretty good.

**Author's Note:**

> happy holidays, everyone!


End file.
